Really. Boring. Stuff. But Agency Life Will Be Better.

I’ve been reading about Kanban (as it relates to software development) and The Theory of Constraints.

It’s really super-boring when you read this stuff and apply it to an advertising agency. But there are a few nuggets in there.

In my line of work, I’m all about Process, Tools and People.

A.     Process – how you get stuff done, start-to-finish
B.     Tools – what you use to do your stuff, communicate about your stuff, and store your stuff
C.   People – the people who do the stuff and their willingness to do A, and use B

It’ll all come together. And by the way, I don’t like to use jargon unless I’m looking to confuse my audience. (yes I know you’re all highly intelligent folks, but Orwell said it best:  “Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.” My everyday word is stuff.

So The Theory of Constraints, as identified in Wikipedia (my go to source for all things about organizational management) goes like this:

The theory of constraints (TOC) is a management paradigm that views any manageable system as being limited in achieving more of its goals by a very small number of constraints. There is always at least one constraint, and TOC uses a focusing process to identify the constraint and restructure the rest of the organization around it.

TOC adopts the common idiom "a chain is no stronger than its weakest link." This means that processes, organizations, etc., are vulnerable because the weakest person or part can always damage or break them or at least adversely affect the outcome.

It goes on…

Types of (internal) constraints

• Equipment: The way equipment is currently used limits the ability of the system to produce more salable goods/services.
• People: Lack of skilled people limits the system. Mental models held by people can cause behaviour that becomes a constraint.
• Policy: A written or unwritten policy prevents the system from making more.

So I could repackage these three constraints as:

A.     Tools – inadequate, redundant, time-consuming
B.     People – unskilled, unmotivated, crappy attitude
C.   Policy – the notion that you are maxed-out and have to say no, or worse, you outsource because A and B were not addressed (aka process – you actually think you have one – but you don’t actually follow it)

Now as for Kanban (as it relates to software development – which is kind of like the process in advertising) – is all about efficient process and improvement. In other words, one that is free of the baggage and crap we load onto a project (or anything for that matter) – which could be an attitude or too many bells and whistles for that website you’ve been trying to get done…for months.

The Kanban method is rooted in four basic principles:

• Start with what you do now
• Agree to pursue incremental, evolutionary change
• Respect the current process, roles, responsibilities and titles
• Leadership at all levels

Now, I’ll repackage Kanban as:

A.     Don’t re-invent the wheel – there’s actually a nugget of process in there. You start a project; it goes through your machine and comes out the other end, finished. Your process is probably messy – it just needs tweaking
B.     Get along, make it better and don’t be an asshole about it. You can actually work with others to improve life at the agency (and it doesn’t require dogs in the office or Beer Fridays), and realize it takes a little time and a bit of input
C.     Respect the things that work, don’t cross into another’s territory, and be honest with one another for cripes sakes
D.    Own the project, the process and give credit. There are huge benefits, like making more money and not hating coming to work every day

So, before you fall asleep I’ll wrap this up into a neat little package. Take a look at the issues in your agency or marketing department (your constraints). What’s driving everyone nuts? What's too cumbersome and taking too much time? Who's not pulling their weight, or worse, being a jerk?

Start practicing a little Kanban and get things done without so much grief.

Yep, that’s a start. Need help? Give me a call (702-370-7447). The first one’s free. I’ll do a little Kanban magic and figure out what constraints are ailing ya.

A couple parting items:
Here’s a lovely link to Orwell’s 5 rules for effective writing
Here’s a link to Orwell’s Politics and the English Language. Read it.

West Coast Leg Of The Agency Salvation World Tour Is Done!

Just finishing up my West Coast Leg of the Agency Salvation World Tour, and met with some lovely folks who just want to get their agencies (and marketing departments) in order; get projects done on time and on budget; and get just a little compliance in the vicinity of timesheets.

What I learned:

• Every agency/marketing department tries switching around things to make the agency better.
• Moving people around physically so they engage with people they normally don’t talk to – whether that’s avoidance because they’re jerks or they get comfy with the same people.
• Reorganizing the reporting structure and assigning new titles – I find this like the proverbial re-arranging of the deck chairs, and often with a similar outcome. Like I’ve said a million times: if you want to know how to make things better, ask the people doing the work. Management comes up with these lame ideas to shake things up and it’s a waste of time. Ask your employees.
• There’s awesome creative coming from in-house marketing departments. Their creatives are legit.
• Catalogs (and other print mediums) are not dead. What’s this trend I’ve been reading about with online news organizations and retailers going to print? Hmmmm.
• Everything you’re experiencing is not unique. So if you have a question and need some help, 100 percent chance I’ve seen it or experienced it personally. I can help.

So, I’m planning another tour the end of summer. Looks like Midwest and/or South. What’s going on in your agency? Need someone to come in and point out . . . the obvious? Or perhaps a chat about that open space concept you’re thinking about?

There are a few other things I learned along this Tour:

• Act normal during an earthquake in Southern California. (I had to go on Twitter to confirm my suspicions).
• The Pacific Northwest is usually torrentially rainy, yet I had warm(ish) sunny days in Portland AND Seattle!
• Awesome customer service comes in the form of Les Scwab Tires. Thank you for fixing my flat tire (south of Olympia) FOR FREE. I’m patiently waiting for them to finally come to Las Vegas.
• Portland’s streets have become smaller – and there is tons more traffic. Beaverton? Yikes! A parking lot!
• Never, ever flash anyone. He/She may become your boss one day.

Send me your suggestions for stops on my next Tour!

Absentee Management

This is about how your employees, staff, workers, come in every day, do their jobs, and save your business because you rarely, or don’t show up for work – or if you do, you only hang out in your office and drift in/drift out without so much as a hello or goodbye. (Not to mention you’re barely taking the pulse of your business).

You, business owner, are a complete jerk. Thankfully, you have people around who care more than you.

You. Do. Not. Deserve. Them.

Last night I watched an episode of The Profit, Amazing Grapes, about turning around a wine store/bar.

I could say, well I’m traveling and I watch reality TV when I have nothing else to do in the evening. Actually this reality show is worth watching. This guy looks at the bottom line and listens to the staff. I like that.

Absentee management abounds not only in this episode, but in others I’ve watched. Sad commentary on the state of small business.

But it happens in big companies too. Managers not showing up for work, much less meeting with their direct-reports on a regular basis creates stress (employees need decision-makers sometimes), creates animosity/fear, and is just plain is heinous.

But back to Amazing Grapes. Awesome, experienced and caring staff kept that place going. Marcus Limonis (aka The Profit), came in at the request of the [absentee] owner. He talked to the staff and got an earful. They care, and are treated like crap. Yet they keep working…for the owner.

For an exchange of $300-grand and 51% ownership, Limonis not only put hard cash into the business in the form of a major remodel, but made the staff owners. Twenty-five percent.

The other thing Limonis did was (in exchange for cash), was reduce the absentee owners’ shares to 24 percent. The people doing the work had the leverage to make decisions that made sense – because they understood the business.

In my line of business – working with agencies and marketing departments to work better, smarter – I see it every day. Creatives, Account, Production, Planning, name your department – are the ones making sure work gets done every day.

And every day, there is a CEO, Partner, VP, Director, Manager – who is absent. Then miraculously, one day they show up and f*ck things up.

Why? Because they don’t know what’s going on in their business.

So, when I enter an agency or marketing department, the first thing I do is talk to the people doing the work. If they’re not fearful (that’s for another post), they’ll not only tell me what they do every day, and they'll show pride in their work; but they’ll tell me about all the roadblocks along the way, how they work around them, and about all the wasted time spent (ALL NON-BILLABLE) because their manager is absent.

Not every employee gets the opportunity to own 25 percent of the business. I always tell everyone that they all own the business.

Too bad management doesn’t get that.

Now, Mr./Ms. owner, VP, CEO, Partner, go and thank your employees for keeping you in a Beamer.

And just show up for work regularly and talk to your team. They're awesome.

Complacency

I’ve been seeing a lot about Apple and their agency TBWA. In this piece, correspondence between Apple’s SVP of Marketing, Phil Schiller, and [only noted as] ‘the agency’. This all comes to light due to documents in the Apple v Samsung patent case.

A few more things come to light.

The message from the agency was in response to a request from Apple to address the attention Samsung’s ad campaigns were garnering.

The message was pure ad agency. Embarrassing. They wanted more money and freedom to develop lots of new content then Apple can choose what they like (pay to explore without a plan). They wanted more meetings. Unnecessary, unproductive and expensive.

Brilliant. It’s a good thing that Schiller is smart and can see a con in a poorly worded email. I can’t even imagine how anyone would think that response was okay.

Oh, yeah. Complacency.

Schiller’s response was shocking. Well, he used shocking in some form four times in the four paragraph response. But he was shocked. The agency’s response was lame.

My favorite part:

“we actually have 2 pretty huge brand-level ideas right now that we love and yet can’t find a way to talk about in marcom, without just simply going out and making them. it’s more like a nike model where they shoot a bunch of stuff and then pick which to run from finished work.”

They actually have 2 pretty huge ideas? They can’t find a way to talk about it without making them? They’re modeling nike?

Did this person start in advertising last week? (By the way, the lack of capitalization didn’t go unnoticed in the article.)

So what I see here is a major, huge, big holding-company agency with the depth of the Platte.

Complacency can happen in any agency (or marketing department), in any role – from planning to creative – to the point that only a shake-up will get attention.

We don’t know what happened next, but it’s clear that Apple wanted more than regurgitated ideas and to write a blank check to develop content they may or may not use – not to mention more meetings.

What we can see is that even the big guys can have their lame, lazy moments.

It’s hard to get to the top of the heap. It’s harder to stay there.

As I’ve said many times: if something needs change and you don’t act, it will be done for you – and you won’t like the outcome.

The Hostile Work Environment

With the recent release of Anita, the documentary about Anita Hill and the hearings to confirm Clarence Thomas to the Supreme Court, I’m reminded of the importance of vigilance in our workplace.

We are all responsible for that vigilance.

Anita’s case was clearly sexual harassment; it’s defined under Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

It was sexual harassment, it was discrimination, and it was a Hostile Work Environment.

I’ve experienced this kind of discrimination personally. I’ve left jobs (without another to go to) because of a complete asshole who wouldn’t leave me alone; and I stayed in a job (albeit for a short time) after I reported it.

It’s what happens when you report it that's a game-changer – and that’s where the proof of a company’s culture (and their commitment to follow the law) really shows.

Harassment comes in many forms. The notion of a superior asking another out for a date and retaliating when rebuffed is an easy one to figure out.

But there are so many other subtle and not-so-subtle ways to be the unfortunate recipient of offending behavior.

From offensive language, to an outright demand for quid pro quo, the range is large (however identifiable). Women as well as men can offend. And the bottom line, I’ve heard many times is this: would you talk to, or treat your mother or sister; or father or brother that way?

In other words, would you treat your closest family member like something that can be used-up, publicly humiliated, or required to perform what others would never find acceptable?

Are you uncomfortable?

We use The Reasonable Person Standard. How would the average person react or respond to the actions of another in your typical workplace? What is the acceptable norm?

If it feels wrong, if you are humiliated, if others around you can see what’s happening and feel uncomfortable, perhaps there’s an issue that needs to be addressed.

It’s really scary to go to your HR department and tell them that your boss or colleague is doing something that you find offensive and won’t quit, doesn’t take a hint; or worse, thinks that their behavior is actually quite acceptable.

For most of us, the daily routine is just that. But when there is an individual who (there’s a range here): makes you wince when they make a comment, to all-out flagrant violation of their employee’s rights (or colleagues for that matter), then you have a serious issue that must be addressed.

Every company in this U. S. of A. is required by law to not only abide by, but educate their employees and enforce the laws that protect them.

Most of us who join a company are at the very least, given a handbook or view a video on rules of the company, anti-discrimination policies, and required to sign a form that we have read, understood and will comply with those laws.

That is where the “known or should have known” standard (superior or commander responsibility) comes into play.

Every company must have policies (and that education I just mentioned) in place so that if you witness discrimination, or even think you have witnessed discrimination, you must report it, and that you know how to report it – without fear of retaliation.

Maintain a zero-tolerance policy. If it feels wrong, it usually is wrong. Even in the advertising or marketing environment, where we are challenged to be ‘creative’, there are limits.

Speak out when you’re uncomfortable or are a witness to something that is just plain wrong.

If they fire you for pointing out the obvious, they’re not worth working for. They don’t deserve you.

And a little reminder, if you don’t speak up, you are a party to the problem.

I leave you with a quote:

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Living Dangerously Through Pie

I'll live dangerously for this pie.

Happy Pi Day. 3/14. Didn’t realize it until I saw a piece on the Houston Chronicle’s site about pie. Nice that they mixed it up with sweet (pecan) and savory (chicken pot) pies.

But this isn’t about those pies. This is about My Favorite Pie. Well, my second-favorite pie. But it’s My Favorite because I can’t find a recipe for my actual favorite.

So on with the danger!

$1,000 French Silk Chocolate Pie, by Mrs. H. E. Cooper, Silver Spring Maryland.*

This gem of a recipe comes from Pillsbury’s 3rd Grand National $100,000 Recipe And Baking Contest, held at the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, New York City, December 10, 1951 – 100 Prize-Winning Recipes Adapted for your use by Ann Pillsbury.

Something actually happened before I was before I was born.

Every so often, Mom would make this pie. It was awesome. It was the only thing she made that was edible. Probably because she followed a recipe.

The danger in this recipe is the eggs. Raw eggs. Two of them. Mom said that they get ‘cooked’ in the process of beating at medium speed for five minutes, after the addition of each egg.

I believed her like I believed the man from Multnomah County who came by every summer with a big truck and a high-power blower to shoot our field on one side, and woods on the other, with DDT to keep the mosquitos to a minimum each summer.

“Just wait an hour, then you can go back to playing in the field.”

We always did what we were told to do.

I believed her because I didn’t detect slimy eggs when I ate the pie. This no-bake filling takes over 10 minutes to mix. For-ever. The eggs must have been cooked.

I never did get salmonella, and somehow survived the DDT. I guess the proof exists: I had children who have grown into normal adults without weird appendages or learning disabilities, and I still have all my body parts.

Anyway, this is, by far, the best pie ever. The proof is in the years of use the recipe book (it doesn’t say cookbook anywhere), from where this recipe resides, shows the wear/tear/pie filling of repeated joyful culinary preparation.

If you live dangerously, the recipe follows.**

And just to cover my ass, this recipe book was copyrighted in 1952. Here’s a link to Pillsbury’s Bake-Off site so I don’t get into trouble.

Oddly, it’s the 47th Bake-Off. If the 1951 Bake-Off was the 3rd, wouldn’t that make the 2014 Bake-Off the 66th?

Amazing, pies are round. We apply pi: the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter, will 66 become 47? Magical day.

Here’s the recipe:

Crust – the pie shell is a traditional flour crust. I usually buy ready-made or a crust mix. If you really want to make a scratch crust, here’s a lovely recipe.

My sis prefers this pie in a graham cracker crust. You can do that too. I like the original version, though, and why add all the carbs?

Filling (the best part, and you can eat it right out of the bowl)

Cream:

1/2 cup butter, then add gradually
3/4 cup sugar, creaming well

Blend in:

1 square (1 oz.) chocolate, melted and cooled (they don’t state, but I use semi-sweet)
1 teaspoon vanilla

Add in:

2 eggs, one at a time, beating 5 minutes after each addition (With electric mixer use medium speed) [this was the ‘50’s after all]

Turn:

into cooled, baked pie shell, Chill 1 to 2 hours. Before serving top with whipped cream and walnuts, if desired. [Walnuts? Nope, don't need them]

And by the way, my favorite pie is Plush Pippin’s (a restaurant in the Great Northwest which is sadly gone) Sour Cream Pineapple pie. My coworker Jana and I, during a particularly desperate time,  bought one and ate it for lunch with chopsticks because we didn’t have forks and were too proud to go to the kitchen and expose the fact that we were willing to eat an entire (almost) pie for lunch. I cannot find a decent recipe for this pie.

*$1,000 in 1951 equates to $9,321.96 in 2014.

** Never consume raw or uncooked foods.***

*** I see this on every menu, so I thought I’d add it for flair and professionalism.

We're Lucky If We Get Timesheets Once A Month

Do you remember what you did on February 3rd? How about the 12th, or how about last Friday?

Neither do I.

So imagine my surprise when a client tells me they’re lucky to get timesheets once a month. Yeah, lucky. Well, they have to get timesheets monthly because they have to bill the client.

Wow waiting for timesheets so you can get your billing done.

Your staff is holding your income hostage. And their paychecks for that matter – but they don’t think of that.

And when they finally get around to entering their time days or weeks later, chances are it’s inaccurate. Actually, it is inaccurate.

To recreate what they did all those days, (and to further their own pain) your staff is probably going back through email and files they worked on (if they even care that much), to get, what they think, is an accurate read on what they accomplished, and what they feel is a giant-pain-the-ass done. . . for you.

No wonder they hate to do timesheets. Everyone is making it harder than it is.

So let me tell you a story: I worked for an agency with about 250 employees in five offices. We installed new software that was pretty easy to use. Entering time consisted of clicking on an icon and entering the number of hours worked. Clients and job numbers already there. Just click.

Then the partners did something magic. They required daily timesheets.

Then they did something else, they locked-out anyone who hit day-five without completed timesheets.

No prisoners. Compliance in five days.

There were still a couple laggards who got locked-out regularly, but they did get their timesheets done.

I’ve talked to agencies that reward (!) employees for keeping their timesheets up to date. Bonuses for doing a fundamental part of their job.

But I guess, whatever it takes, punitive measures or a bonus for doing your job; timesheets are the way an agency can tell how much time it actually takes to do a job. That translates to estimating accurately, billing a client properly, and in the end, making just a little more than you spend.

If you have agency management software, chances are it’s really easy to input time. If it isn’t, maybe it’s time to ask your software provider to help you out. Most write programs that make it a cinch to enter time – from anywhere – like an iPhone, or Android.

Then there are really no excuses.